Who's the Real Todd?, Ch. 49

        Pete walked into the house, he glanced up the stairs, shook his head, and went to find a beer. He unscrewed the top and took a long chug and walked out to the back terrace. In his mind, he replayed the night events. Perhaps the most satisfying thing had been getting their rapt attention in the end. The power he had felt commanding them to tell all and knowing they were helpless to do anything else. He started chuckling.

       Todd had had enough. The sound of Pete's laughter was the breaking point. He began to scream as the horror of what he had done ripped through him. He collapsed to his knees with the bottle still in his hand. He was back in charge but dying inside. With another scream, he hurled the bottle as far away from him as he could. His scream echoed through the clearing. He hated himself. There was still something inside him that he had calmly allowed Pete full rein tonight. He had told himself that they deserved it, that he was just letting Pete show them what they had done to everyone in their experiments. He had been lying to himself. He had watched it all play out in front of him and could have stopped Pete, but he hadn't. He had opened that cold place in himself and purposely hurt those men. Tonight he had become the monster.

         He felt sick inside, everything was wrong now. How could he face Blair knowing what he had done? His stomach lurched and Todd pushed himself to his feet and made it to the edge of the terrace before losing the beer Pete had just drunk.

         She watched as he stumbled to the edge of the terrace. His scream had awakened her and she had rushed to find him. Blair knew deep in her heart he had done something. Something so bad, he was now suffering for it. She wanted to go to him. She hated when he was suffering. If she went out there now she was afraid he'd push her away. Even as she told herself to stay put, she watched him sink to the ground and begin to cry. Her own tears started to fall, and she knew rejection or not, she wasn't going to leave him out there alone.

          Todd's despair was palpable, he didn't deserve Blair or any of this happiness. He should be put away where he couldn't hurt anyone again. His actions tonight proved that he wasn't any better than Carlo or Kipling.

         "Todd you have to stop this. If you're as bad as you think you are, you wouldn't be sick about it. Pete doesn't rule you. What we, and I mean all of us, did tonight was horrific. We did it. We hurt two men willingly and yes, a part of us relished it. It was wrong, but we've been pushed for so long, we finally pushed back." Samuel had been trying to get through to him, but he didn't want to listen.

        Pete stood next to Samuel, bewildered by Todd's reaction. He had been shocked to find himself back inside without any warning and then more shocked by Todd's scream. He had started to ask Todd what had happened and realized that he couldn't, Todd had somehow shut off his voice. He had been stunned. Samuel and Ms.Perkins had looked at him in alarm and Pete had felt insubstantial for a moment. Then the world righted and he was whole once more but still without a voice. Pete felt afraid for the first time in his life, and where before he had always wanted to be separated from the rest of the alters, now he felt if he left them, he would fade away.

         Samuel tried again to get through to Todd and knew it was hopeless. Todd was separating himself from them. It was almost unreal. When Pete had started to fade, Samuel had thought that Todd was integrating with him. He had been fearful that Todd had decided he liked the feeling of power he had felt over Kipling and Hesser. Then Pete had returned but was still unable to communicate. Now even though the rest of them still had their voices, Todd was shutting them out. There was nothing they could do to help him. He watched helplessly joined by Ms. Perkins and Pete.

        Todd felt like he had that first night years ago. His mother had left and he was alone in his room. His father had just come in and grabbed him holding him in the air, almost strangling him. He had yelled at him and told him it was his fault for his mother leaving. He remembered thinking then, that his father was right, he was an evil little boy and that was why his mother had left. Todd laughed even as his tears continued to fall. God, his father had been right. He was evil and his mother had been right to leave. He should leave for Blair's sake, he should leave now and never come back. His heart was hurting at the thought of giving her up after just finding her. He had to go. Now that he knew just how bad he was, he couldn't stay with her. If he had hurt her before in his ignorance, what could he do to her now that he understood what he was really capable of?

          Todd's breath caught as he heard her walking towards him. "Stop Blair. Don't come any closer. I shouldn't have come back here. After what I did, you should stay as far away from me as possible. I'm leaving. Don't come looking for me." he took off running around the side of the house and got in his car and left.

          Blair stood there stunned. She had only seen him like that one other time and it had been after he had found out Jack was his. Then, she had thought he had left because of her lie, only to find out later it was because he had given their son away. She had thought that was the worst thing he could have done. My god, surely he hadn't done worse than that. She was stupid, he had just roared out of her life and she didn't even know why. She ran into the house and called John. She had to find out what went down. If she knew what happened, she might be able to find him.  He wasn't going to just leave her, not again, she wouldn't let him.

           She had tried his cell continuously, but it kept going to voicemail.  "Damn it, Todd, answer!" She was frantic. He had looked so haunted when he had run away. Where could he have gone? Blair had contacted Vicki and told her Todd had left unexpectedly. Vicki had wanted to know what had happened and Blair wasn't able to tell her much. She explained that Todd had gone out and when he returned he was very upset about something but had refused to talk and just left. "Vicki if he contacts you, please let me know."

          Blair called John next but was informed that he had left for Philadelphia. The talk around the station was that something big had occurred. Blair felt sick, whatever had sent John to Philadelphia had something to do with Kipling. She prayed Todd hadn't killed anyone.

          The phone rang and Blair jumped, she didn't recognize the number and decided to just let the answering machine take the call. Then she heard his voice. "I guess I'm glad you didn't answer. I had to let you know I still love you no matter what. You didn't do anything wrong, I just can't be with you right now. You're going to find out what I did and I can't bear the look on your face when you do."

          Blair grabbed the phone. "Todd talk to me. I don't care about anything but getting you home. Please come home, I love you, nothing could make me change my mind about that. God Todd, you have to believe me! I'll help you work through whatever is hurting you."

         "It's no good Blair. I'm bad news. I'll just hurt you in the end." his voice caught. "Don't look for me... Goodbye, Blair."

        "Toddddd!" she was crying, collapsing into the chair hugging the phone. They had been so happy two days before. She was so scared for him. Something in his voice had sounded so resigned. He truly believed he was a danger to her. The phone rang again."Todd is that you?"

         "Blair, this is John, I wanted to talk to Todd but I guess he's not there. Do you know when he'll be home?"

          "John I don't know. He's disappeared, I've been calling all his haunts and contacts and no one has heard or seen him. I'm worried John. Are you back from Philadelphia?"

          "When did you see him last, Blair? It wasn't last night by any chance, was it?"

           "No, John, He left this morning. He was out on the terrace early and he looked like he was upset about something but when I went to talk to him he said he had to leave. There was something in his voice. It scared me, John. This, on top of what he wrote in that suicide note, I'm afraid of what he's thinking."

          "Blair, can he see? Does he have the implant?"

          "Yes John, he does have the implant. He can see, he took off in his car. John, why are you calling to talk to Todd? What has happened?"

          "We got Carlo and Kipling this morning. They were almost hand-delivered. The station got a call early this morning from an unknown source, giving the whereabouts of Hesser's hideout and Kipling's secret lab. My officers tell me that Hesser's compound is up on Llantano Mountain, not too far from Dragonheart. They hit the compound around the same time I hit Kipling's home. Just before entering Kipling's lower level, I found out Hesser's men were at the compound, but Hesser was missing. When we got down to Kipling's Lab we found out why. Hesser and Kipling were in Kipling's Lab. It was bizarre. Both men had been injured. and were sitting in wheelchairs. They were arguing when we arrived, blaming each other for the condition they were in. It's like they weren't even aware of how strange that was. Hesser claimed Kipling had abducted him and injured him. Kipling said Hesser was lying and that he was the one who had done the injuring. They are adamant about it. Then as soon as they heard my name, they both started talking at once. We had to separate them so I could hear their stories.

          That's why I wanted to speak to Todd, they both confessed that they had a hand in Todd's experience and also Manning's. My men have found a tape revealing everything Carlo did or had done to Todd following his accident eight years ago. I wanted to tell him it was over. It concerns me that he left you this morning of all mornings. Blair, someone had a hand in turning over Hesser and Kipling to us. Is it possible Todd knew what was going down? You, yourself, said he could see. Could he have orchestrated this?"

          "John, do you really expect me to answer that? Todd was here this morning when you say all this went down. Is he smart enough to have thought of something like that? Yes, but you said Hesser and Kipling were alive when you found them. Do you think, after everything he's been through, that if he found them they would still be alive." Blair was praying John would go with her on her thoughts. He had seen what had been happening to Todd. It wasn't logical to assume he would let them live. It made more sense that Todd would have killed them if given a chance.

       "You're right Blair. If I was in Todd's shoes and found out where these guys were, I'm not sure I wouldn't want them dead too. Whoever did this, wanted them caught and punished. Right now, we're going with the statements of both men that each was hurt by the other. With the evidence of the tape, and the confessions of both Hesser and Kipling concerning the experimentation on both Todds, as well as the hired hits on both Todds, I'm sure they're both going to prison for the rest of their lives."

        "John, you said both men were injured. How?" Blair inquired.

        "Kipling's artificial hand was forcibly removed according to the EMTs and his other arm was broken in two places and his real hand was crushed. Hesser sustained multiple fractures to both of his legs. They were only partially set. According to the EMTs, they have to be rebroken and set properly. Both men will be spending a number of their initial days in the prison hospitals. Both men also appeared to have been in contact with the implants which we found them holding when we arrived. The whole scene was bizarre. Someone got revenge in a very unusual way that's all I can say.  Let me know if you hear from Todd. If he doesn't contact you soon, I'll help you look for him. You're right about one thing, He's been close to the edge for too long. Something might have happened to push him off that edge."

        Blair put the phone down. She knew what Todd had done, the minute John mentioned that Carlo and Kipling had been in contact with the implants. My God, she thought, somehow Todd had put Kipling and Hesser through the same thing he and Jake had gone through. He had tortured them. That was what was eating him up inside. No wonder he felt she would hate him. He had done the one thing he hated more than anything. He had subjected someone to torture. Now that it was over and he had done it, he must have felt like he had given in to his own dark side. Her poor Todd, he was out there somewhere, once more being haunted by the father he thought he had conquered. She made her mind up, she would find him and bring him back and prove to him once and for all he belonged with her.